Lección de sala de espera.

Right now I’m in the waiting room of the hospital, I see around me and the anguish in the face of the parents is inevitable.

As parents, we do not want ANYTHING to happen to them, but sometimes it happens and can be as minimal as a tonsil or something much more delicate like the heart or brain, and regardless of the seriousness of the matter, saying goodbye to a child going to the OR is Sad, that I can say with certainty because it has been our turn to say goodbye to M3 many times .
Today we are waiting for M1, it is a very fast operation, with low risk of complication and also hand of the team of doctors who have operated to M3 in 6 occasions. The chief surgeon is absolutely confident and we know we are in the best hands. When we left the house, we did it safely, when we said goodbye to M1 we did with a kiss, a hug and even a joke. Today there were no tears or uneasiness, everything will be going well, as always.
To appreciate the sun we must have darkness, and today thanks to all these goodbyes of operation, we could do without a tear.

Familias, de todo hay.

This post was inspired by # HayVidaDespuésdelos6 by Merak Luna. Here  you can find all the great posts that participated in this topic.

I come from a traditional family, from those where the grandparents within their traditional and Catholic framework had many children. Each son formed his family and today we are very many of the paternal and maternal side.

Living in Quito (no matter how much capital it is, it is still a small place and with many people still with archaic ideas) does not give to see much beyond the traditional.

To move to Chicago was to move to a world moved and super diverse. Diversity presents us with other realities and other minds. What a reason Darwin had in writing that productivity and offspring grew stronger in a diverse environment.

In college I met someone who would become one of my best friends, rather one of my soul sisters. S is part of my family and my monkeys share a lot of time with her and her partner. The two are a family, as family as the five of us.

Because S & C have always been, I mistakenly assumed that the monkeys knew (??) that they were a couple and I was wrong. Last summer we met a couple of mothers who have a daughter who is a companion of the Kukla, when we met the monkeys had thousands of questions (of all types) and the Boy and I decided to treat the issue as when another child sees M3 using their orthopedic appliances and asks many questions. We let them ask, and let the moms answer.

Children are so curious and so eager to understand, that it is natural that they want to know why not all families are like ours. When it comes to talking about sex, sexuality and families, you have to explain them to your emotional understanding and your age. Nor should they be silenced when asked in front of others.

M1 has a friend that is adopted, and for him it is very cool to know that his friend came from Germany to live with his African American mom and his Ecuadorian dad. M1 has long known that to form a family it is not necessary to be pregnant, nor to have father and mother.

A few months ago it became clear to me that my children know that marriage is not necessary to have a family, that people can live on the basis of love, that there are couples of man-woman, woman-woman and man-man, who do not All couples who marry want children and that not all people with children are married or have a partner. They are also clear that the family is a bond between two people and that it is able to extend beyond the couple and the children. Children can also be dogs or cats and uncles are not always blood.

En nuestro mundo no americano, es normal que los abuelos sean familia clave así que ante los americanos somos también “no tradicionales”. Los monkeys tienen a sus abues por mi lado, y a mi abuelita, tienen sus tías (mis hermanas) y las tías que son familia por elección. Tienen además una abuelita estupenda  Pita (mi ex-suegrastra) y al hermano por adquisición del Chico que es el tío Danny y a sus primos por ese lado. Tienen a los tíos que son los amigos inseparables del Chico y que aunque haya un montón de distancia también siempre están.

Somos un familión!! Y lo mejor es que el lazo que nos une es el amor, así como a cualquier otra familia. Las familias somos eso, gente que se ama.

I asked the mothers of Kukla’s friend, how they would like the people that people told their kids about homosexuality and they told me NATURALLY.

There is still much to pave the way for non-traditional families to cease to be a “delicate” theme. You have to stop taking the subject with tweezers and do it naturally. The best thing about raising children is that we have in our hands open minds and the power to give them the gift of empathy and understanding. Learning from us is always the best option. Here I leave a note to talk to children about  simple sex .